Tomorrow is Krystina's birthday party (ALL DORA, ALL THE TIME!), a lot of invitations but not too many kids. It should be a lot of fun though. My family can't make it, my mom is sick... it's weird to me the things that the human body does when it's stressed. I let Krystina plan it herself, pick out her own everything... it is cute and fun to watch her little brain do it all.
Someone pointed out to me recently that I take on WAY too much, can't say no and am going to give myself a nervous breakdown. Funny to me because Grant has said that before but above that it's probably true. I don't say no to people, I just smile and clench my teeth before I agree. I hate to dissappoint people, I feel like i have spent the majority of my life doing that, so now as an adult I don't want to. I want people to be proud of me, I want to live up to everyone's standards including my own. I know that I take on way too much but I want to be everything to everyone. It's a weird thing too... knowing that I am running myself ragged but yet still doing it. I find the humor in that. I told Grant that when he gets back from all this training that I get a massage or a spa day... just to relax. A day for me to forget life, to enjoy the quiet and tranquility of life.
I have a fantastic life, a wonderful husband and daughter and some great people in my life to support me. The more I think about my Avon walk the more I am thankful for what and who I have in my life.
Someone pointed out to me recently that I take on WAY too much, can't say no and am going to give myself a nervous breakdown. Funny to me because Grant has said that before but above that it's probably true. I don't say no to people, I just smile and clench my teeth before I agree. I hate to dissappoint people, I feel like i have spent the majority of my life doing that, so now as an adult I don't want to. I want people to be proud of me, I want to live up to everyone's standards including my own. I know that I take on way too much but I want to be everything to everyone. It's a weird thing too... knowing that I am running myself ragged but yet still doing it. I find the humor in that. I told Grant that when he gets back from all this training that I get a massage or a spa day... just to relax. A day for me to forget life, to enjoy the quiet and tranquility of life.
I have a fantastic life, a wonderful husband and daughter and some great people in my life to support me. The more I think about my Avon walk the more I am thankful for what and who I have in my life.
Here are my list of goals for this year:
- Learn to let go - the past is just that, the past and I need to move on and grow from it. Remember the people as great memories and experiences, regardless of their current place in my life
- Spend more time with Krystina- to watch her grow is amazing and I want to teach her so many things
- Spend more time with Grant - as a newly married couple we need to have our time. With his schedule it is hard to make it a set day but maybe we can try that. One date night a month
- Realize that I can't do it all - no matter how hard I try I need help
- Forgive - I may never forget but I really ned to forgive all people for their shortcomings and how they affect my life
- Be a great : daughter, sister, aunt, mother and wife
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